Three words that can change the course of a teen’s life! Are You Ok? These words can start a very important conversation with a young person that can show them that someone cares and is there to help!
Everyday about 12 youth die by suicide, and about 25 more make an attempt! This month is national suicide prevention month, so let’s talk about how you can become more educated on the waning signs and the protective factors that can help a young person to stay alive.
First, what can you do to help protect young people from ever feeling the despair that some feels when they are suicidal?
1. Be connected to your teen! Be positive with your feedback for them and make sure that you send quality time together. Sometimes that means engaging in the activities that they are interested as well. Learn about their interests, take long car rides to do errands (they will sometimes talk when they don’t have to look you in the eyes the whole time), watch their TV shows etc.
2. Communicate with your teen that you are open and ready to talk when they are. Ask about their friends and their activities but don’t push. Don’t always give advice just listen and reflect what they are feeling back to them to show that you understand their perspective.
3. Monitor their activities and social scene. Know who their friends are and their whereabouts. Even though they say that they don’t want you to, deep down it means a lot to them that you care.
4. Role model good coping strategies in your own life. How do you handle stress? Teens still learn from our molding behaviors so show them how you would like them to handle their stress. By doing that for yourself. Sometimes that can help us as well.
5. Talk with your teen about their feelings on a regular basis. Hint: ask them what they think not how they feel, they will tell you how they feel anyway.
6. Help your teen to solve problems on their own. Good problem solving skills go a long way.
Now some of the warning signs
Changes in personality and mood: sadness, anxiety, withdrawal irritability etc. are all something to be very curious about.
Changes in behavior and friends: reduction in positive activities and friends and moving to dark patterns. Decrease in grades and family interaction.
Changes in sleep patterns: too much and or too little sleep
Change in eating and exercise habits: too much and or too little eating and exercising
Non suicidal self-injury: not just cutting there is burning, hair pulling and many more types of self-harm.
Engaging in risky behaviors with little thought around the consequences.
Wanting access to lethal means like a gun in the house and or collecting pills and other things that can kill you.
ANY TALK about suicide! Also look for drawings, music, poems, or any expressions around death and dying! This must be taken seriously at all time!
MYTH: Talking about suicide will make someone suicidal! The truth is, it is important to ask someone if you think they are suicidal, what their feelings are. Asking honestly about their thoughts can actually help to prevent someone from dying by suicide and from making attempts. Asking about their thoughts around suicide can be a relief for the young person and give them hope that maybe things can get better with the help from others.
Having Warning Signs doesn’t mean that someone will die by suicide but ignoring these signs can increase the risk! So if you see some of these signs talk to your child and maybe reach out to their school counselor, your pediatrician, a therapist or 911. There are also hotlines like 800-273- talk(8255), or text 741-741, the crisis textline.
Also, sign up for the Youth Mental Health First Aid Course on October 26th & October 27th!
Source: Dara Caputo, LCSW-R. ASK Board Memeber, Youth/ Adult Mental Health Instructor